Michael J. Sullivan, best known for his Riyria novels, started a new series The Legends of the First Empire with book 1, Age of Myth.  I enjoyed this first novel (reviewed here) and had high hopes for the sequel, Age of Swords.  Unfortunately this second book was hard to read, glum, boring for the first two thirds before speeding into high gear for the last third.  Had I not gotten it through NetGalley I’d have tossed it aside well before the half-way mark.  (I had the same problem with the Riyria Revelations, thoroughly enjoyed book 1, then floundered about half way through book 2.)

Why is the first half of the book hard to read?

Little Character Development and Action

The characters are the same but we don’t see anything new with them.  Persephone is still leading her people despite feeling like a fraud; Raithe is still hanging around but doesn’t quite know why.  We don’t see these people doing anything except packing up to evacuate their old home.  Sullivan doesn’t show us anything new about any of these people, no character development, no witty dialogue.

Mawyndule has a small role that is interesting at first.  A Miralyith young lady plays with his ego and hormones to get Mawyndule to flirt a bit with a Miralyith-supremacy group that manipulates events for a coup attempt.  Any reader can see what the young lady is doing but Mawyndule falls for it.  This episode is important because it frames the reason why Lothian will decide to war against the Rhune.

Women Power

I’m all for strong female leads in fantasy novels and Persephone is a great character.  But Sullivan really went all out in The Age of Swords with smart ladies inventing clever solutions while the men stayed home and boasted and got drunk.  It got a little tedious.

Technological Advancement, Or How to Invent Wheels, Writing and Archery in a Week

Rhune lacked the wheel, knew nothing of iron or even bronze, were unaware of writing and no one had bows and arrows.

Brin developed writing for her own use, a beautiful accomplishment.  Somehow, a week later she was able to decipher tablets worth of texts that she didn’t write.  Moreover, the author of these tablets was an ancient being, alien, not a Fhrey or a dwarf or a Rhune.  I’m sorry.  Literacy is magic, but not that magic.  Look at how we still cannot decipher Linear B which ordinary humans wrote within the last 3500 years.

Roan developed wheels and bows and arrows the same month Brin developed writing.  The real problem is that archery is tricky; you can learn the rudiments of sticking an arrow on a bow and shooting in some general direction but it is difficult to do well.  I doubt anyone could first figure out the bow, then realize arrows need fletching to stabilize, then give to a friend who can master shooting in a few days.  Not going to happen.

Rhune Society and the Fhrey Tribes

We learned a lot about the Rhune society in Age of Myth.  It’s a typical tribal/family system with a chieftan (male) supported by his wife and his trusted lieutenant First Sword.  Each tribal group has a mystic and a Keeper of the Ways, likely female, who keep the tribe centered on its heritage and past knowledge.  The individual tribes vary in terms of how civilized they are, whether they use agriculture or rely on hunting, trade, wealth, so on.

We don’t learn anything more about the Rhunes in Age of Swords that we didn’t know from Age of Myth.

The Fhrey tribes are mostly based on family except for the Miralyith who use magic.  Knowing how societies work when one group has special powers that others lack, we can expect infighting between the Miralyith and the rest, and some does show its ugly head in Age of Myth and now in Age of Swords.  I think Sullivan can do much more with this although he will need a careful hand to keep it interesting and not polemic.

Mystery Character

Trilos, an older Fhrey (at least looks like a Fhrey) sits in front of the Door every day.  Trilos has a suggestion for Imaly, the Fhrey Curator, to avoid tearing the Fhrey apart in a Miralyith vs. everyone else civil war:  Blame the Rhunes.  This could work despite having so many holes and such leaky logic that no one could seriously believe it.  At best it gives Lothian an excuse to avoid a bloodbath at home and instead go kill some negligible folks.

The interesting question is why this mystery person does this.  Does he simply want to avoid Fhrey vs. Fhrey war?  Or does he want the Rhune to war against the Fhrey?  Or something else?

Overall

The Age of Myth set up a detailed fantasy world using characters and its action-filled plot to tell a story and build the world.  Age of Swords spent about 60% of itself re-setting up the same world, characters and plot.  Sullivan could have avoided all this set up, edited out much of the first half, and had a tight, moving novel.

One star for the first two thirds and four stars for the finale.  Let’s say 3 stars.

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I loved the first book of Eileen Enwright Hodgetts Excalibur Rising series for its intriguing take on King Arthur and its quirky characters who felt like real people. Book 2 was a bit of a let down and Book 3 drops us with a thud.  In Book 2 Marcus and the peasant boy Dristan flee Albion to Earth; now in Book 3 Marcus and Todd and Freddie flee from two mob bosses.

Book 3 isn’t much fun.  Marcus and Freddie and Todd clutch at straws to find a way back to Albion.  Since Marcus just got back to Earth the whole thing feels like we are on a giant treadmill, rushing around and going nowhere.

The basic flow of the book is Freddie and Todd are on the run; Marcus and Dristan get back to Earth; everyone ends up at the inn with a dragon sign; Freddie, Todd and Marcus are now desperate to get back to Albion; Dristan sneaks off and Bors threatens everyone and acts nasty.  And at the end we on Earth might have a dragon hatching.

The writing as usual is good and Hodgetts introduces a couple new characters. Kevin, the local crop circle expert is great and Dristan develops as a character.

I am not sure whether I’ll read Book 4.

Book 3 is hard to rate.  Let’s say 3 stars.  Here are my reviews for Book 1 and Book 2.

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It’s always delightful to find a new author to love, books to buy then snuggle up to read.  It doesn’t happen often enough.

Recently Adrian Hilder’s fantasy novel Inheritance, part 1 of The General’s Legacy made its way into my Kindle book pile.  I got it along with a hundred others via Instafreebie, most listed with only the cover so every pick was a guess and golly.

Authors’ newsletters clued me for which novels to read first.  All the shape shifter and vampire, YA romance went to the back of the pile, along with any promoted by newsletters that were incoherent, full of swear words or boring.  Hilder’s newsletter caught my eye because he sounded down to earth, authentic, humble yet confident that his work of love, Inheritance, is worth reading.

I agree. Inheritance is outstanding, especially for a newbie author.  Book 2, The Whiteland King, nearly matches it for quality and compelling reading.

Plot

The Whiteland King picks up immediately after Inheritance, with Valendo’s forces divided in two.  The larger group stays to defend the country from the undead army and ends up besieged in Dendra castle.  Prince Cory leads a tiny group into Nearhon to end the war.

The story moves fast. The plot is exciting enough to keep our interest and we aren’t sure how Cory will triumph or who will survive, or who will end the problem how with Nearhon’s lead mage, Magnar.

Whiteland King missed a couple opportunities to make more of the Dendra defenders under siege.  For example, the men fear the undead necromancer will re-animate any creature that dies, yet one horse dies and is not re-animated.  Despite the defenders being curious nothing happens about the horse.  I thought the author could have developed that into a little vignette, either explaining that the horse’s rider somehow left it immune to the necromancer, or that it indicated the sorcerer was absent.

The defenders’ situation was grim after a week or so, with their food stores destroyed, no feed for the horses, unable to sortie, unable to receive reinforcements or materiel from the outside.  The Cory narrative continues for about 10 days after this, so presumably the defenders had no relief.  I wondered a few times how they were doing, how they continued to survive the necromantic attacks.

Writing Style

The author develops three main points of view, the besieged defenders, Prince Cory’s band, and the Nearhon group of King Klonag, Magnar, Julia, Commander Brocksheer, easy to follow with smooth transitions.  We never wonder where we are as Hilder breaks the point of view changes into chapters and orients each one, e.g., “Resting his face against Sunny’s warm neck Cory…” followed next chapter by “King Sebastian watched…”

I admire Hilder’s ability to add small details into the main narrative flow.  He doesn’t sidetrack us with abrupt segues to tell us about the scenery or expand the minor characters; instead uses a phrase or two to show us.  This keeps the novel flowing.

For example, minor character Toldroy acts as a guide for about 3 pages.  We learn more about Toldroy when we find that “he kept some of the steps in the staircase loose so they creaked ensuring no visitor could arrive unannounced.”  That tells us about Toldroy:  He is more than he pretends, and he has good reason to be afraid, and we can feel the dark staircase and hear the creaks.

Whiteland King is the second book in The General’s Legacy and it combines with Inheritance to tell a complete story.  The two together have a beginning, middle and end.  The Afterword mentions a third book but I expect it is set later and has different challenges.

Characters

Julie shines in Whiteland King.  She shows courage, resourcefulness, dedication, honor, honesty, family devotion. Julia introduces us to a new character, Lyam Brocksheer, equally honorable and dedicated.  Neither is perfect so you know they could be real people.  Julie is impetuous; Lyam is willing to deceive his king when Klonag expects repugnant action.

We get a glimpse of Cory as a child and see a little why the General chose him and we see him grow as he faces what must be done.  Cory’s brother, King Sebastian, also sees what he must do, takes a deep breath and does it.

One of my favorite characters is Zeivite, Arch Mage of Valendo.  Through him we meet his daughter Petra who plays a major role in the plot but doesn’t take up a lot of room on the stage.  I expect we’ll see more of Petra in subsequent novels.

Just as with Inheritance the novel starts with a vignette that is incidental to the plot.  We meet Flynn, merchant and orphanage master, whom I hope to see again.  Flynn is interesting!

Petra’s reminiscences in the early vignette hint at another mage, a mysterious bald man who is an instructor at Petra’s school.  He’s another one that is likely to show up in later books.

It was refreshing that neither Inheritance nor Whiteland King used swearing or blasphemy and most of the older characters are married and happy about it.  I’m always glad to find a book with decent moral attitudes, sadly harder to find now.  Hilder is matter of fact about God and heaven and hell; he doesn’t preach, it’s just assumed that of course God exists.  I liked that.

Setting

Inheritance moved slower in the beginning, with people going about their daily life, romance and courtship, government, family worries.  Hilder spent a little of the slow period lovingly showing us Valendo; we got to know its green hills and waterfalls, the towns and castles.

Hilder took a different approach with Whiteland King.  He bundles the setting description into the narrative.  It doesn’t work quite as well as a method to show us the landscape, but it also allows setting to get out of the way and let plot and character run the show.  Part of Cory’s mission trudges through a high plateau in a winter blizzard.  Hilder could have bored us to tears with the snow, or spent a paragraph or so to help us feel the cold.  What he actually did was to skip right by the winter scene; we read once that Cory was miserably cold and uncomfortable huddling in a yurt.  That felt rushed.

Setting helps us feel and experience alongside the characters.  Too much description and we’re bored and too little and the story loses some of its emotional impact.

Emotion

Whiteland King has a tiny bit less emotional punch than Inheritance.  We feel tension, worry, love, concern, fear, all tempered by the fact that the Valendo people have no choice.  They either move forward or they die.  The do-or-die nature actually calms the heart, allowing the characters to still feel – and us along with them – but also to shove their feelings to the back and get on with the task.

Summary

I rated Inheritance a solid 5 stars, and would give Whiteland King the same.  I thought Whiteland King was just a hair less polished than Inheritance, as it felt a bit rushed and I would have liked to see more of the Dendra Castle group, but overall it is excellent, well written, with solid plot and people.  The setting and emotion were less solid or intense, still very very good.

Sometimes new authors put their heart into their first novel and don’t have much left for the second.  Hilder delivers outstanding fantasy in both novels in the series and I look forward to reading the third one when it comes out.

5 Stars